Birth Doula Blog
Why Exploring Your Unwanted Birth Matters
When it comes to labor prep you know to get your body ready for the big day. You will practice yoga, find a breathing technique that works for you, fuel your body with the right food, and become mindful of your body's mechanics. But did you know the most important labor work is mental?
The deepest work you will do in labor is emotional, mental, and spiritual. You will need to surrender to the great mystery that is childbirth. You will not know how or when baby will come. You will need to give up any time limits, expectations, and control to go deep within yourself and labor peacefully. Labor is not a time for holding back our primal instincts or allowing fear to hold us back. It's a time of surrender and acceptance.
We all have hopes and expectations on how labor will go, but the reality is, it's not entirely up to us. There are many things within your control: your environment, people, interventions, and tools. How the baby chooses to move, an unexpected diagnosis, your history, and time are all things that are not up to you and can greatly affect labor.
I invite you to think about the things you cannot always affect and imagine yourself facing them. You might feel concerned or frustrated at first. Then, tell yourself, "I accept this path, and here are the things I know and can do with what I've been given." Begin to release the sense of responsibility you have and educate yourself now on what these scenarios might look like. When you bring the unexpected and the "scary" into the light and begin to understand your options, they no longer have a hold over you.
Thinking of the things that scare you will not make them a reality! A successful birth experience isn't just one where you've checked all the boxes on your birth plan. It's one where you make informed decisions because you have the knowledge on how to move forward and get the birth that aligns with your values.